I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I am naked and annoyed.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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