think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
