i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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