just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Randomize
