I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Just invented taco cereal.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
