Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
