What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
apparently the secret to your success is patron
I should be sponsored by Trojan
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Randomize
