So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
