Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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