she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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