brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
