so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Quick, to the slutcave!
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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