Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
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