Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
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