We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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