Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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