I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
