i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Randomize
