I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
hell yes lets make some ravioli
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
