____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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