everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
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