it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
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