erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Randomize