so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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