We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
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