well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
