Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
