I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
