coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.�
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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