I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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