Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
