i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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