I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
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