Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Randomize
