I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
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