how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
