She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Randomize