Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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