I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
