ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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