She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
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