You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
