Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Randomize