So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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