AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Randomize
