I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Randomize
