At least make sure they are 18
Why
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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