Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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