I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
vagina is talking i cant
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize
