ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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